He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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