We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I'm at about main and main street
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
