it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize