Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Randomize
