at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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