Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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