worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Sorry my hands just texted you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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