I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize