I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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