don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
He kissed a someone with a penis
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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