After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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