I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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