i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
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