omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize