so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
she smelled like a LAN party
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
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