Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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