I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
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