In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
