this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I just realised I've never been sober in my apartment
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I just forgot I was standing up.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
