I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
