Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
How naked do you want me to be?
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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