somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
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I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
did you really just send me an instagramed dick pic?
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
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she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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