Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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