Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
zippers are such a cool invention
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
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