Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
i dont even know how to be here
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Randomize
