I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
