I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Floor bacon is actually really good
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