Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Randomize
