Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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