doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
