i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
So here I am, sexting at work.
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