Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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