I would go down on you faster than GM stock
It's just like the Real World with babies
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
