we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
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