He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
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