to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Randomize
