My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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