I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize