whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
they're like a gay fantastic four
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
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