omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
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i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
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Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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