You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
this boner is exhausting
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
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