I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
i want to swaddle you in tequila
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
