is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
