Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Randomize