why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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