Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
