yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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