Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
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