Clothes are such an inconvenience.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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