it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Randomize
